Connected believing

I just came from the gym and am sitting here sweating, writing this down. You see, I listen to loud music when exercising, and the song that came on today was Amanda Marshall’s “I Believe in You”.

The song never fails to make me cry. Usually I am a total weeping wreck when I hear it. I don’t know whether it’s because it makes me think of my kids, and how I want to say this to them, over and over, all of them, because I know they are fantastic and wonderful and I DO believe in them. Even when they are doing things I don’t understand. Even when one of them still refuses to speak to me.

Or maybe it’s because I haven’t heard that said to me very often. Or said it to myself, for that matter.

I’ve reached the point in my life where it is no longer appropriate to blame my parents for everything, but praise was scarce in our house. My marriage continued the pattern – praise rare, competitiveness heavy. Work – same. We moved a lot, so friends, true friends of the sort who actually really really support you, were rare. Sometimes it seemed like no one would believe in me, least of all myself.

I’ve had a few folks in the past few years say this to me, and it is as wonderful as balm on a burn. Someone told me I could write. Another told me I could do something else. My now good friends seem to believe in me, whether I do something or not. 

But we don’t say it often enough. It’s too easy to offer reasons why things can’t be done, to discuss limitations, to indicate in a myriad little ways that no, we don’t believe in someone.

Let’s all stop that, shall we?

Instead, let’s turn it around, go for the belief thing first, support people, facilitate their growth.

As for me, I like the reminder of Marshall’s song. It makes me think of how I can express support to those around me, how I can let them know how much confidence I have in them.

And it’s a great motivational song with just the right beats per minute for the elliptical…