The occasional wallowing, or how I wish I could chat with Sophia Loren

I have a lot of friends who are dealing with chronic illness or the illness of loved ones or bereavement or even the loss of pets. So when I saw this article, it called to me: "The Other Side of Grief" by Whitney Akers. The article links to a group of stories about how people coped…

Prepared to grieve

The tragedy of the Humboldt hockey players bus crash and the loss of all those sweet boys was and is truly horrible. I feel for parents and friends and other teams and everyone involved. Especially the driver that survived... But while this is happening, and we respond by doing things like putting hockey sticks outside…

On September 11th, change, and homeostasis

Fifteen years is a long time. Listening to the memorials for the 9/11 disaster, I find myself thinking about two things - the thousands and thousands of people of all nations who have lost their lives in war since then - and the changes that have happened to me and in the world since then.…

Just that kind of summer…

I'm sitting here in the kind of heat that reduces me to tears anyway, but what IS is about this summer? It's hot, even for the climate change deny-ers. It's stormy. Animals are being fried in closed up cars again, and I have no doubt babies are as well. People are shooting people. People are…

Dear mum

I'm thinking of you today. I'm not sure why this bright winter day brings you to mind, but maybe it's a confluence of two things I've read. The first was "Dear Fatty", by Dawn French - her memoir, written as a series of letters to people she knows and loves. We never shared Dawn -…

The end of an era

There's something terrifically sad about the end of a generation, that moment when the last of a set of siblings pass away and you realize, with shock, that there is no one left who truly remembers your parents as kids and you forgot or were too busy or wrapped in your own details to ASK…

Aubade, by Philip Larkin

Love Larkin's poetry. This one, an aubade, or a dawn song, usually apparently written by a departing lover looking at a sleeping woman, I'm posting for two reasons - first, to remind me I want to try my hand at this format, which deals with separation, distance, longing; and second; because it is both beautiful…

“Read it and weep. I always do.”

Ah, Romancing the Stone, one of my all time favourite cheesy romantic movies, both for the Danny DeVito chase scene, and for the author's retort to her friend, who accuses her of being a hopeless romantic. "No," she says, "not hopeless. A hopeful romantic." Yep, I know how that goes. That whole hopeful romantic thing.…

The warped door

In every life, there seems to be a closet of unresolved feelings, undealt-with crises, unhealed wounds. I know I have one, and sometimes  it's all I can do to shove things in there out of my everyday sight so that I can focus on what needs to be done to get myself around in a…

Motherless daughters and sons…or why I avoid card shops in May

I might have said before about how much I hate Mother's Day. First, I hate it cos I always review how I coulda, shoulda, woulda been a better mother. It's kind of like New Years Day resolutions with no way for recovery. I mean, I tried to be a good mum - I used to…