On porn, or the decidedly awkward moments of writing about sex


As you may know, I have MS. As you also may know, I am writing a book about MS and relationships, particularly intimate relationships. Why? Well, they say, them as can't do , teach... Seriously, though, I started this project (to my children's everlasting squeamishness) when I was first diagnosed with MS. I am single,…

Returning to modesty


I picked up this book the other day - bought it new! Thought it might have some pertinence in our lives of TMI, loudness, lack of privacy or respect, rape culture writ large and small. Well. It's not that the author is a nutter, exactly. I mean, she does have some good points about modesty…

“Sex is a word count” Lilly Cain


Often, in a gathering of writers (what IS the proper collective noun? A scrawl of writers? A clattering of writers? A thesaurus of writers?), wisdoms shared expand to more global proportions. Yesterday I was thrilled to attend the Romantic Writers of Atlantic Canada's event on publishing your first novel. As with the mystery writers I…

Single and okay with it…


It's still not approved of. Especially for women, but I've got to admit I've been guilty of it, too. When I see a profile on a dating site that says the guy is 50 or older and never been married, I have to admit it gives me pause. Because, if we aren't totally horrid, someone…

Sexual politics and boundaries and the messiness of both


Lately I've been involved in a bit of reading and discussion about sexual politics and etc. The politics started with the excellent book by Laura Kipnis, The Female Thing: Dirt, Sex, Envy, Vulnerability. It's well worth a read, well-written, funny, and to the point, about the foolishness of the roles we assign ourselves as women…