It seems oddly appropriate that I am spending countless hours reading and listening to the words of old white men in the month where the Roman Catholic Church elected a new Pope. I have my doubts that enlightenment arises through the overwhelming administration of the Church, but there’s always hope.
And it’s interesting, from a female perspective, to read about Socrates and his gang, men all, who debate the issues of the world while, no doubt, the women around them cook and clean and raise their children and fix their sandals and sweep the ground they tread upon and generally speaking, run the world.
I’m not saying there isn’t good stuff in their discussions, that they don’t have fascinating perspectives on morality and such – but at the same time, these educated men treated their women as slaves, drones, property. It is hard for me to appreciate the one without hearing the undercurrent of the other.
It reminds me of the Confederate South in the US, going on about how to live properly while standing, elegantly booted, upon the necks of their slaves.
So on I read, trying to absorb the discussion, while hearing behind it the murmurings of my ancient sisters and wondering how on earth one can discuss morality as a concept while living such an amoral life.
Oh yeah, I get it now – you merely redefine it to suit your needs.
Sadly, we don’t seem to have evolved past that, even these many years later.
I’ve always known that my life would be a tapestry, as Carole King sings. Once I thought I might like to be a doctor, but I knew that focused a life was not for me. I want diversity in my life, a muddle of alternate activities, a variety of sources of joy.
For a while there, I called myself a ‘jack of all trades, master of none’ – because I try things for awhile until I know how to do them, then move on to another challenge.
But I think there’s another way to look at this. I’m managing to piece together not only a life filled with new learning (which I learned today can alter your nerve synapses throughout your life), but I’m also doing research for writing.
I’ve never been the kind of gal who can just slice open a vein and pour the writing out, not without filling myself up first.
So I play some ukulele, do some rug hooking, walk on the beach, swim my laps, take courses.
And then my creative mind is full to bursting and I can let it out. And I find that while I am doing all these other things, my inner self has straightened out plot points or sorted out my thoughts. It’s magic!!
So, my suggestion to anyone feeling blocked out there is to patch together a creative life of your own. Do something physical, large motor – or mindless and repetitive so your inner wheels can spin.
Life is so rich and full of creation. Wallow in it.